There’s a Difference Between an Opinion And Forcing People to Follow It

Ricky James Alan Bryant
6 min readJan 6, 2020

--

I got attacked on Facebook for having the opinion that being polyramous was ick. I had no idea what it was and based on the definition to me it is ick. It’s not something I’m into. Then on top of that because I’m gay and find sex with women disgusting now I’m degrading women and misogynistic?

Okay let me put this to people straight out: I’m not intolerant of anyone I am all for equality and to let people live however they want and have whatever opinion they want as long as they aren’t forcing me to do their opinion.

Just cause someone has the opinion that something is disgusting isn’t intolerant or even ignorant at that matter, that’s just how that person is. I have had straight guys and women tell me thousands of times over that they think gay sex is disgusting, fine by me doesn’t bother me any, I feel the same way about having sex with a woman, to each their own that’s our opinions, I’m not gonna force a straight guy to change his mind or force him to be gay and as long as he respects me and does the same there is no problem.

This is why social justice warrior has become such a bad term these days it’s not about being tolerant or progressive it’s about forcing everyone to be the same or have the same opinions or forcing people to do your opinion and that’s where it’s wrong.

It’s like my situation with Shawn, everyone can have their opinion on it that I need to move on and let him go, they can have that opinion all they want but in the end it’s my choice and my decision how I handle this and forcing me into silence about him by not spreading the truth about what he’s done that’s forcing me to do your opinion against my will and having no respect for what I want even though this situation has to do with me and my feelings.

Another way of being ignorant or intolerant is by trying to take people’s rights away or using the government to force everyone to practice your personal beliefs or opinions. It goes both ways, LGBT+ shouldn’t force religious people to do things against their will and religious people shouldn’t force LGBT+ people to do things against their will. To me going into a shop and trying to buy a cake and then getting refused service is wrong so I’ll take my business elsewhere, trying to stop me having housing I’ll take my business elsewhere, but involving the government to force them to make you a cake or a house? That’s too far. Tell your friends, tell your family and LGBT+ about the place and if they support you they’ll take their business elsewhere. The religious people are doing the same thing, they are electing people into office to force their homophobic beliefs on everyone.

I think all people should get equal pay for the same position despite of gender, race, sexual orientation, gender identity or religious beliefs and all that and the government should enforce that cause it protects everyone, not just one.

And also it’s about company policies too, I don’t expect a Christian store to hire a gay man or a lesbian, course if I know the store is a Christian store like Hobby Lobby or a Christian book store, as I gay person I’m gonna steer clear of putting a job application at these places anyway, why subjugate myself to the obvious? Just cause you’re gay and Christian doesn’t mean that all Christians are gonna see you as a Christian and we all know it.

Now for say a business like Walmart or even public schooling, if a person is outright homophobic or transphobic and posting it publicly on social media and the company or schools have a policy that no one should be discriminated against and you get fired, the company or school has that right to fire you cause your opinions are public and reflect on the company or school you work for but what you say in the privacy of your home or in DMs should stay between you and that person and should go no further but when you are posting homophobic and transphobic statements publicly and the company finds out and fires you, that’s that company’s right.

There are privacy settings on social media too where you can privatize anything you post, whether it be Facebook or Twitter and if you privatize your profile and they find out cause someone screenshoted it and sent it then we’re crossing into a different line. Personally a person’s statements if they are found to be homophobic or transphobic when it comes to social media should only be if they posted these opinions publicly where others can see them and if so, then it reflects badly on the company you work for and they should fire you but if you say it privately in your home or in a DM or text message, in that case that’s probably invading someone’s privacy, it’s like someone sending you a pic of their gentilia and then you’re sending it to other people, that’s not right and is an invasion of that person’s privacy.

But it also depends on the situation, if a person is slandering you for example by making claims that you are a crazed ex or a rapist cause they told you they’d date you or talk about living with you while you bought them stuff, then showing the evidence against them is completely a different subject cause the other person in the wrong by lying on you and you have a right to set the record straight or trying to warn people off a person for their protection.

There are lines that are crossed for everything and exceptions to all rules but it comes down to 4 simple rules:
1. Treat everyone equally.
2. Treat everyone right by treating them as you want to be treated.
3. Allow everyone to have their opinion.
4. Don’t try to force other people to do your opinion by any means.

Live and let live people. By the end of the day it all comes down to, is if a person has an opinion you need to ask these questions:
1. Are they forcing me to do their opinion?
2. Are they using the government to force their opinion on me?
3. Are they doing me physical harm or trying to murder me cause of their opinion?

If the answer is no to all these questions then let a person have their flipping opinion and express it, just cause it hurts your feelings doesn’t mean that person doesn’t have the right to their opinion. Everyone has them, and not everyone always has to share them but it is their right to do so if they want to, if you don’t like it, then just have nothing to do with the person and walk away and don’t say anything or just say I disagree but you have a right to feel as you do, it’s when they try to enforce their opinion that it stops being an opinion.

So for me I find polyramous and having sex with women to be disgusting and repulsive, people say the same thing about me and having gay sex, big whoop. We agree there are certain types of sexual activities that are disgusting. Not everyone is into everything that another person is into and that is their opinion and, I cannot force them to think or feel otherwise when it comes to their preferences. People are going way too far and being too overly sensitive on somethings at times as Taylor Swift said, “Can you just not step on my/his/our gown(s)? You need to calm down.”

Let me put it like this: There are people into being peed on and drinking it. That probably repulses a lot of people cause they aren’t into it. Does that make them a bad person or intolerant? No. It’s a preference. You can’t force everyone to do something they don’t want to do or change their opinion that something is gross. Trying to force them to or guilt them by calling them ignorant for not being into something is going too far.

It’s like claiming gay men are transphobic because they don’t want to be with a trans woman. Not everyone is bisexual or pansexual, gay men want to be with a man, not a woman, if you want both genders you’re bi or pansexul and that’s fine but it’s not transphobic for a gay man not to want to be with a trans woman. So because I’m gay and want to be with a man and not a woman at all, I’m transphobic? Who’s the one trying to force me to be with a person of the opposite gender? Isn’t that a bit homophobic? Thought being gay isn’t a choice? Just saying.

People are making mountains out of mole hills over preferences and opinions.

--

--

Ricky James Alan Bryant
Ricky James Alan Bryant

Written by Ricky James Alan Bryant

Fighting against homophobia and social injustice.

No responses yet