Taylor Swift “this is me trying” Review

folklore album cover © & ℗ Taylor Swift

Since Taylor Swift won Album of the Year for folklore at the 63rd GRAMMYs awards, making her the first female artist to win three Album of the Year GRAMMYs, I have decided to write a review on one of my favorite songs from the folklore album entitled “this is me trying”. I am going to break down the song by verses/bridge and choruses and explain the topic of each one and give my own personal opinion on them. So let’s begin.

I’ve been having a hard time adjusting
I had the shiniest wheels, now they’re rusting
I didn’t know if you’d care if I came back
I have a lot of regrets about that
Pulled the car off the road to the lookout
Could’ve followed my fears all the way down
And maybe I don’t quite know what to say
But I’m here in your doorway

I just wanted you to know that this is me trying
I just wanted you to know that this is me trying

The first verse and chorus has to deal with a person (Swift intentionally left the gender neutral) who had it all and lost it for unspecified reasons and is having trouble adjusting to their new life and everyday begins to struggle with contemplating suicide. They don’t think someone would care if they came back (whether this be a partner, friends or family is left completely to the interpretation of the listener) and regret that they are feeling this way. The narrator talks about how they take their car to a lookout and contemplate giving into their urges to driving off the edge but they chose to drive away and go back to those they love and that just by doing the act of not driving off the edge is an act of trying. Personally I believe the narrator is saying that no one knows what is going on inside for this of them but that’s my own personal interpretation of the verse.

They told me all of my cages were mental
So I got wasted like all my potential
And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad
I have a lot of regrets about that
I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere
Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here
Pouring out my heart to a stranger
But I didn’t pour the whiskey

I just wanted you to know that this is me trying
I just wanted you to know that this is me trying

At least I’m trying

The second verse and chorus deal with a person who, in my interpretation of the lyrics, was not encouraged enough as a child and told that they everything they thought or felt was mental and so they ended up turning to alcohol to cope and when angered while drunk they spoke out in harsh words and hurt many around them. Due to this they started falling behind their classmates and decided to seek the help of a psychiatrist (based on the line “Pouring out my heart to a stranger”) to deal with their alcoholism and that every day they don’t “pour the whiskey” is an act of trying and that at least they are trying to better themselves.

And it’s hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound
It’s hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
You’re a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town

And I just wanted you to know that this is me trying
(And maybe I don’t quite know what to say)
I just wanted you to know that this is me trying

At least I’m trying

The bridge and final chorus speak about how the narrator is a struggle everyday to cope with dealing with the loss of someone important to them, whether this be a special friend they formed a bond with, a family member or partner, again the interpretation is solely based on the listeners and how the lines may relate to them, and how no matter where they go they are always in pain without this person and they see them everywhere they go as if the person they are missing is a movie playing in the lenses of their eyes and all they want is this person and so everyday they struggle to continue on living a daily life without this person and that this at least is an act of trying.

Now according to Swift in folklore: the long pond studio sessions on Disney+ Swift was thinking about people who deal with addiction or struggle with mental health issues or every day struggles and how people often don’t know about it or how close someone is to going back to that very dark place and that people don’t pat the person on the back for at least trying everyday not to go there and as co-writer Jack Antonoff also pointed out that even when you are trying everyday, it’s not good enough. Honestly I think this song captures the true essence of what it is like to struggle, whether it is going through a mid-life crisis or mental health issues or addiction and that people don’t see how it is for the person dealing with those struggles and I can truly relate to this song as there are times that I have been suicidal and there is a person who I want in my life who means the world to me but no one sees how every day without this person or not wanting to end it all due to the pain is an every day struggle and that is why this song became one of my favorite songs on the album because Swift shows us how through her songwriting, even if she herself isn’t going through it she can empathize with those who are and help raise awareness of people’s everyday struggles and put it in such a beautiful song. I believe this song is so under-rated and deserves more praise than it gets as it’s a good way of telling people be careful with someone cause you don’t know what life is putting them through.

If you would like to hear “this is me trying” you can listen to it below or you can stream it on Apple Music or Amazon.

“this is me trying” is written and produced by Taylor Swift & Jack Antonoff.

Fighting against homophobia and social injustice.

Fighting against homophobia and social injustice.